本章重點包括：

一、信用是否合宜，要用義來檢驗

信用要合宜，靠義來檢驗，如果這個信用不合於義，那就不能守信，言語就可以反復；反之若信用合宜，言語就一定要照辦。所以承諾的話也不可以輕易地說，君子對此的態度是「欲訥於言」。

二、看重對方，依禮行之，可以遠離恥辱

恭敬就是看重對方的態度，行為上還要近於禮，也就是依著身分表現出合宜的舉止，如此別人才不會看不起我們。

三、親近良師益友，創造家族團結

因，有依靠的意思，依靠你親近的人，就是指那些良師益友；因還有婚姻的意思，結婚的對象雖為外姓，但也會成為你的親人。所以習俗上辦母親喪事的時候，還以舅舅為最大，結婚、訂婚，母舅都要坐上桌。宗族的大聯姻，可以造就親族的和諧。至於帝王為了統治，創造出抄家滅族的刑罰，並不屬於儒家的思想。本章告訴我們，人生的宗旨，就是要親近良師益友，講究家族的團結。

學而篇第十三章白話解釋

 【經文】

有子曰：信近於義，言可復也；恭近於禮，遠恥辱也；因不失其親，亦可宗也。

【字詞解釋】

遠：ㄩㄢˋ，遠離、避開。

【白話解釋】

解法一

有子說：一個人說話有信用，其信用必須合宜，則言語可以反覆，即便反反覆覆的說，都能說得出去。合宜則守信，不合宜則不必守信，否則招來過失。恭敬別人，一定要有禮數的表現，也就是要合乎禮節，才能遠離恥辱。如果恭敬而不合禮，或為人所輕侮，而不免恥辱。你應當親近的人，不要對他太疏遠，不失對他的親近，寧可尊敬，彼此互相關懷。這樣別人就會認為你這個人值得尊敬。

解法二

有子說：一個人說話有信用，其信用必須合宜，則言語可以兌現，即反覆思維所說的話是否合宜。合宜則守信，不合宜則不必守信。恭敬別人，一定要有禮數的表現，也就是要合乎禮節，才能遠離恥辱。如果恭敬而不合禮，或為人所輕侮，而不免恥辱。而婚姻必須慎重選擇對象，不要失掉可親的人，即不要失掉門當戶對、有品德的人，姻親亦是九族之內，結了婚之後，也可以成為宗親。

《論語講要》原文

「信近於義，言可復也。」信，是一個人說話有信用。義，是合宜。復，古注作反復講。信與義不同，但必須近於義。信由言語表達，信須近於義，則言語可以反復。即反復思維所說的話是否合宜。合宜則守信，不合宜則不必守信。

劉氏正義說：「孟子離婁篇云，大人者，言不必信，唯義所在。是信須視義而行之，故此言近於義也。鄭注云，復，覆也，言語之信可反覆。案，復覆古今語。說文，復，往來也。往來即反覆之義。人初言之，其信能近於義，故其後可反覆言之也。」

皇疏：「信，不欺也。義，合宜也。復，猶驗也。夫信不必合宜，合宜不必信。若為信近於合宜，此信之言乃可復驗也。若為信不合宜，此雖是不欺，而其言不足復驗也。」

不合宜之信，皇邢二疏皆舉尾生事例。尾生與女子約會於橋下，女子未來，大水忽至，而尾生為了守信，竟抱橋柱，不肯離去，被水淹死。史記蘇秦傳，莊子盜跖篇等，均載此事。像尾生這樣守信，即是不近於義。

「恭近於禮，遠恥辱也。」恭是恭敬人，自己要卑遜，但要近於禮，也就是要合乎禮節，這才能遠離恥辱。如果恭而不合禮，便是恥辱。皇邢二疏皆引用周易巽卦爻辭「巽在牀下」為例，說明不合禮。巽是卑順之意，巽在牀下，是卑順過甚。

「因不失其親，亦可宗也。」因，孔安國注，以及皇邢二疏，皆作親字講。宗，作敬字講。意謂所親不失其親，亦可宗敬。亦即所親的是仁義之人，是為不失其親。能夠所親不失其親是有知人之明，故可宗敬。朱子集注：「因，猶依也。」意謂依靠亦須依得其人。此亦可學。

又，因作姻字講，宗是宗族之義。婚姻必須慎重選擇，方能不失其親。姻親亦可在九族之內，故云亦可宗也。

潘維城論語古注集箋，以及劉氏正義，皆引桂馥群經義證，考據古籍及說文，因不失其親的因字，是婚姻的姻字。可宗的宗字，程氏樹德作宗族之宗講。漢儒解釋九族，除直系九族外，又有父系母系妻系共為九族之說。因此，程氏解釋：「締姻不失其可親之人，則亦可等於同宗。」

English

Teacher Tang Yuling will accompany you to read The Analects

14.Book 1 Xue er (On Learning), Chapter 13

The philosopher You said, “When agreements are made according to what is right, what is spoken can be made good. When respect is shown according to what is proper, one keeps far from shame and disgrace. When the parties upon whom a man leans are proper persons to be intimate with, he can make them his guides and masters.”

Highlights of this lecture include:

1. To keep one’s promise when it is right and proper

  Whether to hold a promise or not depends on a good judgement of what is right. When the claim of trustworthiness is not proper to realize, do not keep your words; otherwise, keep your words reliable. One shall honor his words with great care, just like a saying goes “a virtuous gentleman would take time in his speech,” do not eager to give your promise promptly.

2. Understanding others’ value and performs proper courtesy accordingly will keep one’s distant from shame and humiliation.

  Respect is an attitude expressed as an acknowledgement of others’ importance and values. Personal interactions have to follow close to proper exercise of propriety as related to ranks and statuses. People who behave properly with consistent good manners will win others’ respect and keep shame and humiliation far away.

3. Get close to good teachers and helpful friends bringing family unity.

  The Chinese character “因; Ying” has two connotations. “因; Ying” could mean reliable; to rely on people close to you, those who help you to improve, such as good teachers and virtuous friends. Another kind of reliance is by affinity--relationship established by marriage. As a result of marriages, members of the two families or clans become close. That is why maternal uncle, though not bearing the same surname, is often the most-honored guest who seated on respectable high place during special Chinese familial activities such as wedding and engagement ceremonies, and in mother’s funeral service and rituals. In Confucian ideal, affinity and kinship united together in harmony and stability. As for the idea of punishing convicts together with members of their kinship and affinity, was mere creation of evil-will rulers. It can never be part of the Confucian thinking.

  This chapter tells us that life is important to have close good teachers and helpful friends, familial unity has to be attended to at the same time.